Spiritual Motherhood: Discipling Women for the Glory of God

Estimated reading time: 7 minutes

Have you ever wondered why some Christian homes radiate peace and purpose while others, though outwardly full of activity on social media, feel fragile beneath the surface? In a culture of busyness and endless advice, many women quietly long for guidance and godly examples. Where are the older women who will walk with the younger in truth and grace, offering more than words but offering their lives? Why do so many women feel alone in learning how to love their families well, live with joyful submission, and trust God’s good design? And why is spiritual motherhood, the heart-to-heart, life-on-life discipleship Titus 2 describes, so often missing in the church today?

Wrestling with God’s Design in Real Life

When I first got married, I wrestled with finding joy in my role. At twenty-one, I was a full-time loan officer and real estate agent, energized by my career and chasing the dream of a white picket fence and a spacious backyard. But when my husband shared his desire for me to come home once we had children, I was flooded with resistance.

I asked hard questions: Why should I be the one to sacrifice? If he really loved me, wouldn’t he want me to be happy in my job? How could we possibly make it on one income in Southern California while he pursued ministry?

The truth is (while some women must work to assist with income, cf. Proverbs 31:15), I had been shaping Scripture around my preferences and dismissing anything that made me uncomfortable. In doing so, I was robbing myself of the peace and purpose that God promises to those who trust His design.

Joy Found Through Surrender and Godly Examples

Over time, through the patient prodding of the Holy Spirit, the transforming power of God’s Word, and the faithful example of godly women, my desires began to change. I tasted the joy that comes from surrender. It didn’t happen overnight, and I still fall short, but from that season forward, I longed for other women to know the same joy of a life yielded to God’s Word & strengthened by the faithful sisters who’ve gone before them.

Please grab your Bible and look with me at Titus 2 for a biblical framework of spiritual motherhood and discipleship. Paul wrote this letter to strengthen the church in Crete, which was facing tremendous cultural pressures. In Titus 2:3-5, Paul outlines how older women are to live and what they are to teach the younger women. From these verses, we draw five essential qualities for discipling women in a way that brings glory to God.

1. She Is Serving Her Family

Paul begins by instructing older women to “teach what is good, so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands and children.” The word “encourage” implies intentional training. This kind of love doesn’t come naturally, it’s cultivated over time. The Greek word used here refers to affectionate, committed love. This is not rooted in feelings, but in obedience to God.

Spiritual motherhood: Godly examples

Several women in my life have modeled what it means to be fully devoted to one’s family. My mother, for example, lives with quiet devotion. Her love for Christ overflows into every corner of her life, from how she serves her family to the way she ministers to friends and neighbors, often behind the scenes. She’s shown me that deep love for others begins with deep love for Jesus.

My mother-in-law is another gracious guide. When I became a pastor’s wife, I bombarded her with questions. Yet she never made me feel inadequate. Her counsel was saturated in Scripture and anchored in reverence for the Lord. Through her, I’ve learned what it looks like to walk in wisdom and honor God with boldness.

Spiritual motherhood: Important mentors

Another mentor has consistently walked with me for over fifteen years. Her biblical counsel on parenting has helped me focus not only on correcting behavior, but on shepherding the heart. She’s taught me to discipline with eternity in mind.

More recently, the Lord brought another godly woman into my life. Her faith, purity, and perseverance through suffering have left an indelible mark on my walk with Christ. She’s shown me what it means to run the race well and to prize holiness even in the hardest seasons.

These women didn’t just teach with their words, they taught with their lives. If you didn’t have those examples growing up, seek out a seasoned saint whose life you admire. And if you’ve been walking with the Lord for years, perhaps it’s time to become that spiritual mother to someone else.

2. She Is Self-Controlled

Paul next describes women as “sensible,” often translated as “self-controlled” or “discreet.” Self-control is the final fruit of the Spirit listed in Galatians 5:22-23, a sweet reminder that it is produced by the Spirit, not by striving.

Author Carolyn Mahaney wisely notes that growth in self-control begins with honest self-assessment. We must identify where sin has a hold, confess it, and invite the Spirit’s help to change.

Here are a few areas to prayerfully examine:

• Bible Intake – Are we feeding on the Word daily?
• Prayer – Are we deepening our communion with God?
• Physical Care – Are we stewarding our health for His glory?
• Speech – Are our words seasoned with grace and truth?
• Time Management – Are we using our time purposefully?
• Finances – Are we faithful and wise stewards?
• Thought Life – Are we taking every thought captive to Christ?

This isn’t about perfection, dear sisters. It’s about progress through the Spirit’s power, and trusting that God equips those He calls for spiritual motherhood.

3. She Is Sanctified

Paul then calls women to be “pure.” In Ephesians 5, we see how Christ sanctifies His Bride through the Word. A husband is called to lovingly lead his wife toward holiness, but she must be willing to let him in, to confess her struggles, and to receive his help with humility. One of the great enemies of purity is jealousy. James 3:14 warns that bitter envy is demonic, leading to disorder and every evil thing. When we compare or resent others, we hinder our effectiveness for the Kingdom. Whether that means stepping away from social media, ending unhealthy relationships, or removing sources of temptation, we must fight for purity.

Holiness is not easy, but it is always worth it!

4. She Is Stewarding the Home

Paul continues, calling women to be “workers at home.” Far from a demeaning label, this is a high and noble calling. The home isn’t a prison to escape, it’s a ministry to embrace. The Proverbs 31 woman exemplified this balance by managing her household, engaging in business, and extending mercy to the needy. It’s not about whether or not you work outside the home. It’s about whether your home remains a God-honoring priority.

Pastor John MacArthur once said, “If your home requires two jobs, sell your home but keep your family.” While that may sound radical in our comfort-driven culture, it’s a compelling call to value what matters most. Whether you live in a mansion or a modest apartment, your home can be a place where Christ is glorified, your family is nurtured, and others are welcomed with warmth and truth.

5. She Is Submissive to Her Husband

Finally, Paul calls women to be “subject to their own husbands.” Though submission is unpopular in our current culture, it remains a clear and beautiful part of God’s design. I remember a time when that word bristled against my heart. But as l’ve grown in faith, l’ve come to see that submission is not weakness, it’s strength under control.

In Genesis 2, God created woman as a helper fit for man. But after the fall, Genesis 3 reveals that she would struggle against his leadership. That tension still exists in our sinful nature, but Romans 6 reminds us that while sin remains, it no longer reigns. By the Spirit’s power, we can choose joyful, trusting submission.

Submission does not mean silence, passivity, or losing your identity. It means entrusting yourself to God as you support and respect your husband, even in his imperfections. Cheer him on! Pray for him! Celebrate his efforts!

Why This Matters

Paul concludes this section with a sobering reason: “so that the word of God will not be dishonored.” As God’s daughters, our lives should affirm the gospel we proclaim. When we claim to love God but ignore His design, we dishonor His Word. But when we joyfully obey His commands, we reflect the beauty and power of Christ. Spiritual motherhood is not just a season, it’s a legacy. Whether you’re discipling younger women or just beginning to be discipled yourself, Titus 2 gives us a vision for femininity that is countercultural, Christ centered, and eternally significant.

Let us be women who love God’s Word, live God’s Word, and teach God’s Word—for His glory and the strengthening of His Church.

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