O My Soul: Pastors, We Must Talk to Ourselves.
Estimated reading time: 9 minutes
Why biblical self-talk is necessary
Pastors struggle with mental health. According to a 2022 Lifeway Research study of 1,000 pastors, one-half said they were discouraged and lonely. Here are the numbers on mental health for pastors:
“Most pastors point to stress as a mental challenge they are facing in ministry (63%). Nearly half of pastors say discouragement (48%) and distraction (48%) are ministry mental challenges, while less than one-third of pastors point to loneliness or lack of friendship (28%), depression (18%) or lack of contentment (17%).”1
After 36 years as a pastor, I know this reality firsthand. Likely, so do you, my pastor friend. Pastoral ministry can be discouraging at times, even disheartening. This is why we must learn biblical self-talk.
An important conversation between you and you
One of the most helpful chapters I’ve ever read (outside of the Bible) is in Martyn Lloyd-Jones’ book, Spiritual Depression. The book was originally a collection of The Doctor’s (as he was known) sermons, and chapter eight is entitled “Feelings.” By God’s design, we have feelings, because we are emotional beings. Yet, we get into trouble when we allow our feelings to control us. With this reality in mind, Lloyd-Jones offers this vital counsel:
“You have to speak to yourself… this horrible self… remind yourself of certain things. Remind yourself of who you are and what you are. You must talk to yourself and say: ‘I am not going to be dominated by you, these moods shall not control me…’ This is the constant exhortation of the Scriptures. If you allow these moods to control you, you will remain miserable, but you must not allow it. Shake them off. Do not recognize them. Say again, ‘Away dull sloth’.” (Martyn Lloyd-Jones, Spiritual Depression)
That’s good counsel for a pastor on a Monday morning! We cannot afford to be passive with our feelings. We must talk to ourselves in specific ways.
And what should it sound like? This is where the phrase “O my soul” enters the picture. Lloyd-Jones tells us what God Himself tells us about biblical self-talk in the book of Psalms.
The Psalms and biblical self-talk
The phrase “O my soul” appears in seven Psalms: 42 and 43 (which may have been one psalm originally), 62, 103, 104, 116, and 146. You might not think that three tiny words would be so essential, but they are. The Lord is showing us the kinds of conversations we need to have with our souls.
1. We learn from Psalm 42-43 that we must talk to ourselves when life is hard:
“Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me (Ps 42:5)?”
2. We learn from Psalm 103 that we must talk to ourselves when life is good:
“Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits (Ps 103:2).”
3. We learn from Psalm 62 that we must talk to ourselves when people attack us:
“For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence, for my hope is from him (Psalm 62:5).”
4. We learn from Psalm 104 that we must talk to ourselves when God seems small:
“Bless the LORD, O my soul! O LORD my God, you are very great (Ps 104:1).”
5. We learn from Psalm 116 that we must talk to ourselves when God delivers us:
“Return, O my soul, to your rest; for the Lord has dealt bountifully with you (Ps 116:7).”
6. We learn from Psalm 146 that we must talk to ourselves when unsure who to trust:
“Praise the LORD, O my soul… Put not your trust in princes (Ps 146:1, 3).”
And I don’t think this list is comprehensive. The lesson the Lord gives us in the Psalms is that we cannot be passive with our feelings. Rather, we must talk to ourselves, do it frequently, and in all situations.
This includes us, fellow pastors. Is life going well for you presently? If so, the Lord says you must speak to your soul about it. Are you frustrated? Once again, it’s time for some “O my soul” talk. Are you happy? Then address your soul. Are you sad? Again, start talking.
Fearful? Hurting? Angry? Start talking!
And where should we begin in this conversation with ourselves? With these three special words:
O my soul:
First, we must say “O.”
Such a tiny word, so seemingly insignificant. But is there really such a thing as an insignificant word in the Bible? Not according to 2 Timothy 3:16, which tells us, “All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable.” So, every verse, every word, every letter in the Bible is for our benefit, including “O.”
Second, we must say “my”.
Of course, this is a personal word, a first-person singular pronoun. It’s a reminder that the conversation that needs to happen when I’m discouraged is very private, and the deacons are not a part of it. Nor is the critic of my ministry. Not even my wife, not yet.
The conversation that needs to happen first is between me and me. I need to say these words. I must wake myself up with “O,” followed by “my.” By speaking these two words, I’m reminding myself that the real issue is not the person who is disgruntled with my ministry or the conversation I’m thinking about having with him or her. The conversation that needs to happen first (and most) is at home.
Third, we must say “soul.”
“Soul” comes from the Hebrew word nephesh (in the Greek, it’s psyche). Our society downplays the soul, and some even deny that it exists. Life is all about the body, we’re told — the material, the stuff we can see. But the Owner’s Manual makes it clear that the soul is intrinsic to what it means to be a human being.
We read in Genesis 2:7, “Then the Lord God formed the man of dust from the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a nephesh, a living creature.”
While we could get lost in the technicalities, it’s not complicated. Every coach knows what soul means, and it’s the subject of many halftime conversations. “Team, your bodies were out there in the first half, but if you don’t start putting your soul into this game, we might as well go home.”
Consider Psalm 103:1, “Bless the Lord, O my soul, and all that is within me, bless his holy name!” Notice the parallel thought. What is soul?
It is all that is within me.
Think of it this way. The soul is what we cannot see, including the heart, mind, will, and emotions. Yet, though we cannot see it, we must speak to it.
If we talk to ourselves too much, people might put us in a straitjacket.
But if we fail to talk to ourselves, we put ourselves in a straitjacket.
Most people talk to themselves. The difference between crazy self-talk and necessary self-talk has to do with what we say to ourselves, why we say it, and what we do after we say it.
Putting Biblical Self-talk into practice: Learning from Psalm 42
What should we do when we’re feeling discouraged? In Psalm 42:5, the psalmist models a conversation that needs to take place.
“Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me?
Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation and my God.”
Psalm 42:5
This is so helpful. When I am discouraged, I must talk to myself in three ways.
First, I must ask myself why. It’s such a simple thing, but vital. I cannot afford to be passive when I’m discouraged or downcast. I need to ask myself some questions, namely, “Why are you cast down, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me?”
You say, “I already know that answer! It’s because people are hurting me!”
But that’s not the answer.
Breaking Free from Negative Thoughts Through Biblical Self-talk
Is it possible to be hurting and not downcast? Indeed, it is. Look at Paul in the jail in Philippi, with his back bloodied from an unjust beating.
What’s he doing? Singing!
How does that happen?
How can you sing when you’re hurting?
Paul did what the psalmist did, and it’s what I must do. I begin by asking myself why.
Second, I must then tell myself to hope in God. Will that help? Sure it will.
How do I know? Is it because God will make this problem go away? Not necessarily. Things may get worse, as they did for our Savior, all the way to His cross. Here is why I must choose to put my hope in God right now.
“I will yet praise Him, my Savior, and my God.” He is my Savior. He saved me from my sins. O my soul, don’t you remember? Don’t you remember when I was lost and heading for hell, and He saved me, not because I deserved it, but because He’s so gracious? And if He would save me from my biggest problem, will He not also save me from this present despair?
Third, I must remind myself that I shall again praise the God who is my salvation. When will that happen? Ultimately, I will praise Him forever and ever in a new heaven and earth, where there’s no more sorrow like I’m feeling now. But why wait, O my soul? If that’s going to happen, why not praise Him right now?
Starting biblical self-talk with worship:
Get a good hymn book and sing out!
In addition to the Psalter, the Lord has given us another source of medicine for the soul. It’s the hymnal. For centuries, God’s people have been doing the kind of soul work we’ve just seen the psalmist do, and we can benefit from their spiritual remedies.
I make it a daily practice in my devotional time to sing a hymn, and I recommend you do the same. It’s a great way to speak truth into one’s soul.
I’ll finish with this example, written by Katharina A. von Schlegel in the mid-1700s.
Be still, my soul: the Lord is on thy side.
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain.
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change, He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul: thy best, thy heav’nly Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.
If you’d like to learn more about speaking to your soul, I invite you to read the transcript or listen to the audio of my two-part message, “O My Soul: The Necessity of Talking to Ourselves.”
You’ll find it under the sermons tab at wheelersburgbaptist.com.
©2024 Brad Brandt. Used with permission.
About The Author
Brad Brandt
Brad Brandt serves as Senior Pastor at Wheelersburg Baptist Church in Wheelersburg, Ohio. He is also Fellow with the Association of Certified Biblical Counselors, and his passion in life is to know Christ and make Christ known to others.
